Age difference - is there a limit? Does age matter in a relationship Does the girl's age matter?

Love is full of contradictions and disagreements. Very often you can hear that opposites attract, and yet we base love on certain compatible things. We are looking for some nourishment in relationships, which is born on the basis of joint "love stories" and romantic dramas. But for some of us, love arises in completely different life circumstances. Sometimes we fall in love "not because of, but in spite of." More often this is not a love story from social networks or an affair with a work colleague, it is not uncommon that this love is initially perceived as a taboo. For example, it could be the husband of a neighbor or a university professor. Does age matter in a relationship? The big question that many people ask. And it occurs when First stage hobbies passed. In the union of an elderly person and a young woman, as in other matters and vice versa, an additional question of morality arises, which, as a rule, also arises among young parents, complicating relations even more. However, if a love relationship with a large age difference develops into a family relationship, then the age barrier disappears.

The age of love is not a hindrance

All the time we try to plan our lives down to the smallest detail. There are those who even plan when they get married. Fortunately, we still leave love a chance to come at an unexpected moment. We allow our emotions to take over us and rush with them to where they take us. Therefore, when the relationship of two people with a big age difference gets into a love whirlpool, they get their development. And if a love affair subsequently results in common hobbies and interests, these relationships continue to develop. The opportunity to gain understanding and a new perspective on relationships becomes much more important than the usual arithmetic that calculates the age difference.

Emotional component

Unfortunately, beauty, which is characteristic of a person in youth, is a very fragile and not durable thing, and those who have a big age gap in relationships recognize this truth like no one else. It is this reason that prompts lovers to look for common ground that will prevail over physical attraction. Special training, individual communication schemes, or a simple heart-to-heart talk can help most young couples. But the psychology of the relationship of those who have a significant age difference, sometimes in order to simply express their point of view, it is important to observe delicacy in order to prevent confrontation. Moreover, all couples go through this stage, regardless of how much or little time was spent on courtship. And this is just the first step in creating an emotional connection. Young couples need a short period of time to move from physical intimacy to spiritual intimacy. The psychology of relationships in which the age difference is significant differs in that both the emotional and the physical aspects of their relationship have to be worked on at the same time. The age difference requires connecting the emotional aspect almost immediately, since they can only move on if they are on the same emotional level. It is important for them to realize that their partner, with whom there is a significant age difference, was there both in moments of happiness and during difficult moments.

Age is important when setting priorities in life

Age is an important factor in a relationship also because life goals people in different time periods are different. A young partner may not want to burden himself with obligations and have children, for example. While the older one, on the contrary, wants to calm down and have a big family. Another significant difference may be the desire to realize oneself in a career. All these distinctive points need to be known and understood, only when the couple begins to follow the same path, their age difference gradually ceases to affect the relationship. The lovers begin to see themselves as a whole and together go towards their dream. In a relationship with an older person, you will have to reconsider the concepts of beauty, you must be ready to listen to questions and preconceptions about age and achieving certain goals. But in fact, age is really a simple arithmetic number that means nothing but the number of years spent on earth. Age matters in a relationship only when there is no love, but if there is love, everything else becomes unimportant.

Does age matter in a relationship? and got the best answer

Answer from 2 answers[guru]

Hello! Here is a selection of topics with answers to your question: is age important in a relationship???

Answer from Igor[guru]
No, it doesn't matter! 🙂
After all, all ages are submissive to Love...! And this is golden glory! ! love does not look at age, or race, or nation, or religion, etc. We are all the same people and everyone has the right to love and be loved ... Well, people LOVE each other...!))) Well, God bless him - with this age!! ! Everyone can love, and age is NOT THE MAIN THING in LOVE, in love, the main thing is feelings ...!
Feelings that will become a SUPPORT, a reliable SUPPORT of relationships! While loving, we do not pay attention to the difference in age and can love a person who is older by 5, 10 and even more than 20 years! After all, LOVE is a strong feeling that turns a blind eye to many things! :)) My opinion.
==========================================================================
Of course, this is just a general outline. And quite harmonious relations are possible, because any marriage - regardless of the difference in years - depends only on the desire of the spouses to find a common language, on their desire for mutual understanding. If the aspirations and goals of the partners coincide, their relationship and subsequent marriage can be no less happy (or even more) than the marriage of peers. The main guarantee of a strong union is not a mark on the date of birth in the passport, but the psychological compatibility of partners. And, of course, love. How could it be without her? As K. D. Ushinsky wrote: “Without labor, efficient, serious work, family happiness is nothing but a romantic chimera.” Psychology.
Good luck! :))

Answer from *summer*[expert]
As they say, all ages are submissive to love! Age is not the main thing, the most important thing is that there is love and there are no barriers! And 5 years is generally nonsense! GOOD LUCK!

Answer from Evgenia Nikulina[guru]
They say that all ages are submissive to love. but 5 and 4 years is the maximum difference in age for me. I heard that if the difference is greater (10 or more years), then little good can come of it. one will walk, change. another wait, suffer.

Answer from ~JEWEL~[guru]
4-5 years difference is generally ideal, I think. Yes, and most importantly feelings.

Answer from HEAVEN[guru]
Net, main biologi4eskyi vozrast

Answer from User deleted[newbie]
Look how old! If so 13 and 18 ... then I think. . it's not compatible! But 18 and 23 is possible!

Answer from tiger cub in the sun[guru]
important for kids in school...

Answer from User deleted[master]
no .. from my own experience I say - I'm 24 he's 20 - and we've been living together for 3 years

Answer from Orxus[guru]
Love for all ages!

Answer from Alexandra[guru]
the best difference is 4 years. Checked on myself))

Answer from Asterisk ™[guru]
No, absolutely not important. 4-5 years is no difference at all. True, depending on what age. And who is scarier. What about you?

Answer from Yoaniya[active]
if interests and sympathy coincide, what age can we talk about?

Answer from Angelina Skorokhodova[guru]
yes no of course, well, I'm starting to understand that if the guy is younger, then there is still a difference, according to the mind in terms of wooing))

Answer from Natalia Moroz[guru]
everyone is jealous of your current age... if you're under 18... and he is older than you, I think the difference is of great importance .... he will hardly be interested and something will come of it .... and when both are already over 20 .. and they are adult accomplished personalities .... . There shouldn't be any problems with this if people are really suitable for each other.. . and up to 20 every year sometimes matters ...

Does the age of a partner matter? Unfortunately, we are rather stereotyped and predictable in this matter. Studies have shown that age has a limit for love.

Hot youth.

Studies conducted by the dating portal have shown that men are much more likely to choose girls younger than themselves or women of the same age, and older women are usually interested in while they are young. It also became clear that women of different age groups are interested in men of different ages. Most often, young girls look for older partners, and older women look for boys.

Men and women differ from each other in that their goals change with age. Basically, men are interested in younger women. Or, the older the man, the younger the girl he is trying to seduce. In particular, during a midlife crisis, when interest in younger partners increases. Women go through this period more carefully - a new experience for them is more important than the age of a partner.

"Values" - first of all.

Both sexes pragmatically assess the significance of the age of the second "half". Young girls rarely start relationships with guys younger than themselves and even their peers, because they do not yet have neither experience nor capital. They are interested in older guys, because the needs and interests of this age group are already slightly different. As a rule, an acceptable age difference is within ten years. Men who are older than this threshold seem to young women as representatives of another era and strong relationships are formed very rarely. Many girls are afraid that older men have a lot more experience, which often makes it difficult to create a lasting union.

Men, in turn, almost do not pay attention to the difference in age, but statistics say that it is important for them that the girl was younger. Many explanations have been invented for this approach, but human nature dictates its own - men “love” with their eyes, and female beauty and age are strongly connected. This rule applies to both single and divorced men. When they find the love of their life, age is not that important.

Middle age crisis.

Younger girls are most interested in men aged about 40-45 years, most often experiencing a midlife crisis at this moment. Sometimes this period can be delayed up to five years, but it is most noticeable at 43 years. Then men are interested in 20-25-year-old girls.

In women, the midlife crisis usually begins around the 40th birthday, but for them this period lasts from 2 to 5 years. Most women experience the greatest load from this phenomenon when they reach 44 years of age. Then women also try to find junior partners, but not as intensely as men.

Kamalova

Good day! I've been dating a guy for over 2 years. I repeatedly found out about his betrayals with other girls, he doesn’t want to let me go, and I can’t be with another man. We have a 7 year age difference. Once again, he lied to me that he flew to Moscow for 10 days. But in fact he is here. I don’t know what to do, it’s unpleasant that he is like this with me. How can I forget him? He doesn’t go out of my head, sometimes it seems that I’m sick. Just keep silent and pretend that I'm not aware of his next lie, or throw tantrums like a normal woman ... confused ((

Kamalova, good afternoon!
How do you feel when you realize that you have once again been deceived?
Tell us a little more about yourself. How old are you? Do you live with a boyfriend? What do you do?
Have you ever had serious relationships with men before?

Kamalova

At first it was insulting, after I think that he probably wants to take a break from me. Now I don't understand anything. I have absolutely no desire to do anything, no desire even to live. I cry all the time. I think that I am weak. I am 21 years old, I live with my mother. But he often visits me, stays overnight. We often see each other. We live not far from each other. I work in the clinic as a manager, part-time study at the institute in absentia. He is my first

Kamalova

No. I think that I act like a wise woman, keep silent about his mistakes. Well, so that the relationship was not a burden to him, to us. Or is it wrong??

Kamalova, but how then does he know that he is causing you trouble?
He does what is comfortable for him and thinks that everything is in order. You suffer, suffer, but at the same time remain silent ...

I think that I am acting like a wise woman, I keep silent about his mistakes. Well, so that the relationship is not a burden to him, to us

Kamalova

Olga, I really want children from him. For some reason, I see him as an ideal man, I just want to be happy. It seems that beautiful courtship love only happens in books. I want to be taken care of, they were always there, moral support is especially not enough for me. Can you advise something? Friends say leave him

Kamalova

in relation to life, to people. in his kindness. Under this description, of course, no does not fit .. ((

Kamalova

I once read a phrase, it’s better to live a moment with a loved one in misfortune than a lifetime with an unloved one. I don’t get anything from these relationships. Only nerves and pleasure. I have such satisfaction from life as if I have everything when I am with him, from him only his presence. But I feel very protected with him. I do everything for him. To look beautiful, the hall, diets, so as not to be stupid, I read abstruse books, I can’t sleep waiting for him, I step over pride and principles as well through my parents. I love him too much

To look beautiful, the hall, diets, so as not to be stupid, I read abstruse books, I can’t sleep, I’m waiting for him,

At the moment, everything looks like this.
You sit, think only him, it seems. That you don’t ask for anything for yourself, endure his deceptions, as a result you suffer, but at the same time you don’t want to let him go, love and expect him to marry you.

Kamalova

yes, you are right. But I don’t talk about it with him. Most likely it’s all nonsense, right? What I thought to myself that I would be happy with him

It's probably all bullshit, right?

This is not nonsense, these are your desires!
Do you need to clearly articulate what you currently want in life?
Do you want a family and children now, or do you want it after some time?
What family relationships do you want? Do you need to understand what makes you happy?
Are you learning whether social manifestations of yourself are important for you, and not just in the family?
And then, already deal with WHOM and how, is it possible?
To do this, you need to communicate with different men, notice their behavior, how they treat you, etc.
And then make a choice. The choice of what suits you exactly according to your desires and requests.
You have not done this work for yourself at the moment. I think it's worth doing it. This may take some time.
It would be good for you to go to a psychologist for personal consultations, here, on this topic.

Start by answering the following questions:
How did you choose your current man? How did your relationship start?
Do you now pay attention to other men?
Do you have male friends?

After you figure out what you want at the moment, you need to talk with your current man about your further communication.

You need to be asked to speak. What do you want from him? It can be fidelity, or you decide that already, now, you want to get married, etc.
What do you like, what do you not like. How do you want him to change his behavior?

Listen to what he wants about you? As he sees the development of your relationship.
What does he want from you? What do you like, what do you not like, and what changes in behavior does he expect from you?

And then it will become clear whether you can agree.
Are you or he ready for those changes in behavior that the partner is waiting for, or is this not realistic?
Well, for example, you want to get married, but he still does not want to bind himself with any obligations.
If it works, then stay together.
If you can't satisfy each other's wishes, you can decide to separate.

Here everything will depend on your choices and agreements.

It is very important for you to understand WHAT YOU want before such a conversation.
And do not get hung up on the fact that this man is the only possible option for your happiness.
Believe me, there are many :)
It is important for you to clearly defend YOUR interests.

Your man may cheat for various reasons. He may miss something from you, he does not talk about it, but prefers to look for it on the side.
If this becomes clear during the conversation, then perhaps you can change something here.
On the other hand, there may be other reasons for his behavior. And, it is not at all certain that it will change.
It is important for you to choose for yourself: will you tolerate what you do not like, or will you find someone with whom you will be happy?

Kamalova

Dear Olga, thank you for being you. Your words, questions. I burst into tears. I will definitely do everything that you said. I’ll definitely unsubscribe after. I’m all glued up as if. Thank you very much. May God give me the strength to say everything as it should be in his face.

Kamalova, please!

May God give me the strength to say everything as it should be in his face.

Kamalova

Thank you very much Olga :)

Unions in which one partner is older than the other have always existed. The attitude of society towards similar alliances has always been diverse. In the old days in Rus', the age difference between wives was commonplace. The wife did not have the right to vote. If she was young and beautiful, but from a poor family, and a rich old man wooed her, they gave her in marriage without hesitation. It is not uncommon for ancestors to marry in absentia. Spouses before marriage did not even see each other. It should be seen that many happy "unequal marriages" have proved by their example that age does not matter.

Modern average statistics show that the average difference between wives is from 3 to 6 years.

Does age matter in a relationship for a woman?

Ladies from a young age are subconsciously attracted to more mature men. Peers, and even more so younger males, seem completely uninteresting. After all, it is not in vain that they say that in growing up, girls are ahead of boys. Over time, such preferences in women pass, but not all.

What still pushes young ladies into the arms of guys much older than themselves? Some psychologists believe that affairs with the lady's dad play a role. If a girl lacked attention as a child, there is a big possibility that, as an adult, she will reach out to older men, find a substitute for “dad”.

If a suitable partner comes across, confident and accomplished, who subconsciously looks for a "daughter", then the alliance promises to be successful. In this case, age does not matter, the couple will feel comfortable.

It is much more difficult to build things when the lady is even older than the man. A lady who has experience in relationships with men is already much more aware of the concept of marriage. For her, it is clear that sex and fun pastime is not a guarantee of a happy union. And young men treat serious relationships superficially and do not immediately think about home life.

There are two possible ways for such relations to develop. The first option is “mother - son”, when an adult lady will take care of her own young chosen one in every possible way. Such cases may well exist. But you need to be prepared for the fact that the "son" at one fine moment will grow up and want independence. Therefore, it is better to immediately build affairs on the equality of the parties.

The second option is when a young man simply lives at the expense of a lady. If this happens by agreement of the parties, then certainly the age does not matter.

Does age matter in a relationship for a man?

Adult, experienced men, in most cases already divorced, often choose young women as companions. Why is this happening? At a certain age, guys have an urgent need to prove to themselves and others that they are still young and strong. It is no secret that the main indicator of strength for a man is sexual activity. And the fact that the choice of the girl fell on this man is in itself a confirmation of the viability in the eyes of others. Age does not matter if the partner correctly assesses their feelings. Such cases can be completely successful.

The other side of the coin is when a man is significantly younger than a lady. Does age matter in this relationship? According to Freud, the Oedipus complex is on the face here, when a man looks for a partner older than himself in order to receive maternal affection that was missing in childhood. Society looks more critically at such couples, while the ladies are criticized in the main. But there are many examples of such unions that are completely happy.

And yet, every couple is unique in its own way. There are no rules or patterns in a relationship. If people like each other, they are great together, they have a lot in common and plans for the future, then age does not matter. After all, the main thing for a family is love, trust, mutual respect, understanding and spiritual closeness.